Divorcing with Kids
LexInter | February 24, 2022 | 0 Comments

Top Things You Should Know when Divorcing with Kids

When you divorce or separate with your spouse as a family of two, things are rather simple: you break up, you sign some papers, you each go on your separate ways. However, when you have kids, divorcing with kids things become a bit messier. They will also be caught in the crossfire of you two divorcing.

If you do decide that you can no longer live with each other as spouses, then you need to “calculate” your kids in as well. You must think of what’s best for them. You should also be aware of how your divorce will affect them.

If you are divorcing your spouse but you have kids together, here are a couple of things to keep in mind.

1. Divorcing May Not Fix the Problem

Divorcing May Not Fix the Problem

Many people try to divorce their spouse simply because they can no longer stand their relationship. However, keep in mind that even if you two may be divorced, your kids aren’t. They are growing up, and they will need their parents. Therefore, you have to see your spouse very often as you are raising your children.

Divorce may temporarily give you what you need, but it may not solve the problem between you two. You may have to discuss more with your legal counselor, or you may need a therapist. You must come up with an agreement on how to maintain an amiable upbringing for your child.

2. Mediation May Be Necessary

In some states, you may have to attend mediation before you file for a divorce. This will cover things such as the custody of the child, along with visitation rights. During this process, both of you will have to see a neutral mediator who can help you reach an agreement.

Custody, visitation, parenting plans, child support – all of this will be discussed during the mediation process.

3. Divorcing with Kids May Be Expensive

Divorces with Children May Be Expensive

Divorces, in general, can be very costly, but it’s even more so when children are involved. Aside from the payment to the lawyer, you may also have to pay for childcare, or even therapy if your children do not take your divorce very well.

This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t do it. Raising your kids in a marriage that does not work may do them more harm than raising them separately. But you should keep the financial aspect in mind so that you can be prepared later on.

4.You Might Need a Legal Separation Period

In some cases, depending on the state that you live in, you might not be able to divorce right away. Before taking the final step, you might have to go through a period of legal separation first. This is done for various reasons, one of them being to help your children adjust to the situation.

While it is entirely possible to do this without a lawyer, it is still recommended to have an attorney help you through the steps.

In Providence, for instance, you may download the petitions on the state websites, but there is still a lot of paperwork that you need to file. To make sure that you don’t get confused through them or do not file incorrectly, you might want to double-check with a Providence divorce lawyer.

5. You’ll Want to Sign Parenting Agreements

Should you be hiring a divorce lawyer

At some point after the divorce, things will begin to change. Parents may agree verbally that the children will spend time with both parents, but depending on the case, one parent might go back on their word.

For instance, a mother who has custody might agree to allow their kids to visit their dad on weekends, but they keep finding excuses to prevent the children from going. Or maybe one parent has certain obligations to their children, but they keep finding excuses to bail or not do their duty.

Even if you break up on friendly terms, you might want to sign a parenting agreement that outlines how the children will be taken care of after your divorce. They cover practical issues, and they help clarify the responsibilities that may come up. You might want to have your lawyer present when you sign this kind of agreement, as it is a legal document.

The Bottom Line

Divorcing when you have children is not as easy as divorcing when it’s just the two of you. There are certain matters that you need to attend to so that your children are not affected more than they should be about your separation. Hiring a divorce lawyer or family law attorney will often help you go through the steps so that you don’t miss anything.

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